It’s been a while since I’ve made an entry – but I have an excuse! Really, I do! I started back at work full-time on Dec. 4 (last Monday). I’m really glad to be back. I was concerned that it might be too early, but so far, so good. It’s great to see familiar, friendly faces, as well as new ones! I certainly miss the hike and tons of little things about it, but it does feel good to be home, too. I am now within driving distance of family and friends, as well as throwing distance of some of my greatest friends. I am a happy camper!
I did have a moment a few days ago. It happened in the grocery store. I was told that grocery store “moments” are common for thru-hikers after they get home. And I had one. I was with Adam, and he was looking at the egg-nog or something, and I was going to grab some milk. I found myself standing in front of the milk cooler in the store, and suddenly this overwhelming feeling came over me and I just stood there. My eyes glazed over for a split second as they locked in blankly on the rows of pink “skim” labels. I thought to myself, “I can’t buy milk! It’s heavy! And it needs refrigeration!” It did hit me very quickly that what I was thinking was crazy, so I opened the door and grabbed a gallon and put it in the cart.
I started to look around at all the people walking around the store – and oh, what I’d give to see a couple of people walk by with big ol’ backpacks on so I could ask them where they were headed! Part of the adventure that I loved is the inquisitive looks we’d get from people. It was so much fun! And it happened most often in the grocery store. You’ve seen pictures of us in our photo page – we didn’t strip our backpacks, hiking sticks, hats, ponchos, or anything before entering. We just walked in like everyone else, walked around, found what we needed, paid the cashier, handed her a card, and walked out. Outside, we’d divvy up the goods evenly, stuff it wherever it fit in each others’ packs, and hike on. We were quite a sight!
I think being back at work and in the same routine I was in before leaving for the hike has triggered something. I have started to experience things like this more often, and I’m referring to them as “flashbacks.” It feels like all time stops around me for just a single moment, and I find myself back somewhere along the trail. Thousands of emotions come over me in one big hit, but quickly leave. It’s like I see a picture of a place I was, I jump in, feel everything with every sense, then jump back out. It’s really neat, because I’m truly “feeling” what I felt when I was hiking. But it’s sad, because I miss it.
The other day I was driving to work in the morning, and a song came on the radio that I had listened to somewhere along the hike. I had one of these “flashbacks,” and when it was done, tears welled up in my eyes. The song was “Every Mile A Memory” by Dierks Bentley. Just the song title alone makes me want to think about every mile. If I could control these moments and hold on to them a little longer, that would be really cool.
It sounds sad and maybe scary, but I can assure you that it’s really a very neat journey my mind is taking me through right now. I so badly wish I could put a link to it in this blog entry so that you can just click, jump in, and feel what I’m talking about right along with me!
Hah! I just had one, now! I heard my mom’s laugh! J
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